It ain't pretty. Especially on me.
Because I wear it like a maxi dress. It consumes me head to toe.
So what am I jealous about?
Everything.
And I mean everything.
But I'm especially jealous that I'm not going to a Blogging conference with all my blogging and writing buddies.
I want to go so bad I even tried to find a free ticket from some poor soul that can't go and would take pity on me at the last minute. Nevermind that the conference is in San Diego - which is not exactly around the corner from SF, and it's over two days, which would mean I would need a place to sleep and shower. And of course I have no budget for any of that.
It's killing me.
Everyone is BlogHer this and BlogHer that.
I want to tell them all to zip it, to stop going on and on about the Tori Burch sandals you ordered at the last minute that are getting shipped to you, or the fun you're going to have at the Clever Girls rock star party. I had a ticket and had to give it up because they have a waiting list a mile long for people that ARE going to BlogHer.
Bah humbug.
I have had it with being unemployed and broke. It really doesn't work for me.
It's not fun.
Something has to change before I implode.
A kid would cry and have a hissy fit. I'm sulking inside, rolling my eyes at all the happy tweets and ignoring all the pre-event posts.
Very mature.
How do you deal with jealousy?
Ah yes, my foe Jealousy. Though maybe BlogHer isn't mine so many other things are: not having a place of my own/feeling like a long term guest with little place to put my family's things & the inability to leave things undone so I can just go out w/the kids?play with the kids, wanting a newer car or more like a van/suv that fits at least 6 (one more than my family size), etc...
ReplyDeleteHow I handle it. Acknowledge it if only to my self and prayer.
That's a tough one. I have very limited means as well and I've just gotten used to being a bargain hunter and making the most of what we have. I will never understand how some people are able to do all that they do and afford all that they have and it used to make me very jealous. The game of "keeping up with the Jones'" was EXHAUSTING. But at the end of the day you just have to dig deep and ask yourself what is it that truly makes you happy and what can you be thankful for. You have a beautiful family. You all are in good health. You have a roof over your heads and food in your belly. You're a great cook. You're educated and talented. And you have loving friends and family. And by a lot of people's standards, you are RICH!
ReplyDeleteYou will find a job soon. Just keep it all in perspective. You're handling it remarkably well. This is just a brief hiatus from your former high-life =)
Jealousy is something we all suffer from time to time. It just comes upon us before we realize it.......other people talk about the travels they are planning, the clothes they are buying, the elegant restaurants they eat in on a regular basis......the list goes on and on. I work with a number of people that have more money than you can imagine, travel more that I would ever have the time to dream about...but.....they have disfunctional families and really bad health. They don't talk about their trips or the restaurants too often because they are constantly tending to the families and seeing doctors several times a week. I discovered long ago you could wish for all these theings that seem glamourous and fun...but with out good health.......they don't mean anything. Our family is so lucky to have good health, wonderful relationships, burgers on the grill, time to sit and laugh about the day to day events with the kids.........This is life...it's the best...and money can't buy this. Loving and caring siblings and parents nurturing the feelings we have for each other.........We are sooo rich.......the rest doesn't matter.
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